I’m pregnant at 17 after having thrilling sex with my married, older neighbour — and he’s furious
Dear Deidre: MY neighbour and I have been secretly meeting for sex. It’s been brilliant but now my period is late and I think I’m pregnant.
I am 17 and have had a huge crush on my next-door neighbour for ages. He is so fit.
My neighbour and I have been secretly meeting for sex but I think I'm pregnant
He’s in his thirties and married, with children, so I know we can’t be together. I’d babysit for them a couple of years ago.
Another neighbour had a party at New Year and I made a real effort to look my best. My friend helped me buy a bodycon dress and did my make-up and hair for me. Even she was amazed, as I’m normally a “jeans and T-shirt” girl. My plan was to seduce this guy at the party.
I spoke to him and his wife and had a few drinks, sneaking outside to the summer house to top up from a bottle I’d hidden there. At midnight, everyone was wishing each other “Happy New Year” and he went outside, so I followed him.
He said he wanted to clear his head, as he’d had too much to drink. We chatted but I was cold so he put his arm around me.
We had sex in his bed and now he texts me to go round every time his wife goes out
I took my chance and put my arms around him too. Next thing I knew, we were kissing. He put his hand up my dress and said I was gorgeous.
We had sex in the summer house. We were outside for ages but no one noticed. I went home feeling thrilled.
I now wonder if he’s just using me for sex or if he does actually want a relationship with me
A few days later, he came round when my mum and dad were out. He said he wanted us to go on meeting up and to go to his in ten minutes.
We had sex in his bed and now he texts me to go round every time his wife goes out. It feels good and he says I’m a passionate girl.
But when I told him I think I might be pregnant he wasn’t happy.
I now wonder if he’s just using me for sex or if he does actually want a relationship with me. Every time I try to talk about it, he changes the subject but we end up in bed again.
I can’t talk to my parents about it and I really don’t know what to do.
Deidre SAYS: Don’t waste time fretting or hoping he is going to show some sense of responsibility.
It won’t happen and you urgently need to find out if you really are pregnant – then make some realistic decisions. My e-leaflet Unplanned Pregnancy explains where you can find practical support.
If you are pregnant, there is no chance of a lasting relationship with this guy, or giving the child a stable start in life with two caring parents.
He has a partner and children. He has been happy to play away but all the signals are that he doesn’t see you as a potential partner or want another child with you as the mother.
If you decide you could cope as a single parent, he will be legally obliged to help maintain your child. But it will be the end of your teenage years as you know them.
Via The Sun
My view: Sorry he doesn’t see you as a potential partner or want another child with you as the mother. He was just playing away and he's not ready to dump his wife and kids for you.