I want my lover for her wild sex drive but now she is pressuring me to leave my wife
DEAR DEIDRE: MY lover has a wild sex drive and I cannot get enough of her but now she has developed feelings for me and wants me to leave my wife.
I am in a real jam as I don’t want to hurt either of them.
I am 34, my beautiful wife is 32. She is an amazing girl who would do anything for me and has always had my back.
We met six years ago, fell head over heels in love and married within a year.
She has changed over the past couple of years, lost her spark with stress over family stuff (her brother has a drugs problem) and she hates her job.
Sadly the sexual passion we once shared is not there any longer. We have talked about it loads and she agrees we need to make changes but they never happen.
This girl at work is a real cutie and we started chatting a few months ago. She made me laugh and I couldn’t remember when I’d last done that. She’s 26. It started with us going for a drink after work to cheer me up and one day a goodnight peck on the cheek turned into an amazing kiss.
We both said, “Wow, what was that?” I went back to her place and we had sex.
We fell asleep and when we woke up we had sex again.
Now I cannot get enough of her, and her sex drive matches mine. She is open to trying anything and everything. It is all so exciting.
She knew and understood about my wife from the get-go and I thought she was OK with a casual fling.
Last night she was quiet and I asked her what was wrong. She said she was starting to really like me and wanted to shout about us from the rooftops.
I told her I will leave my wife but I don’t know if I can. She has done nothing to deserve this.
DEIDRE SAYS: Sex can rarely be isolated in a box – feelings tend to follow. Your affair is no longer just about sexual needs, your lover has emotional needs too.
This triangle can’t stay static any longer and surely you owe it to your wife to try to revive your sex life so you’re not vulnerable to cheating on her?
Tell your lover you didn’t mean to hurt her but want to try to save your marriage and so must end your affair.
Tell your wife that you understand she’s worried but that together you have to work out better ways to de-stress before your marriage ends up on the rocks.
She has had your back in the past now she needs your support to help her with the tough time she’s going through.
My e-leaflet Reviving A Woman’s Sex Drive will give you both tips on how to get the spark back.
Source: The Sun
My view: You don't have to leave your wife for her, if you can have both of them.