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I fear for my kids after their uncle died as they might never get over their grief


DEAR DEIDRE: MY brother died last week. I’m so overwhelmed with grief and pain but it’s my three young children I worry for most.

They are ten, seven and five and adored my brother.

I am so sad for my kids now my brother has passed away, they adored him

My marriage to the children’s dad broke up and he was the perfect uncle, helping them with all sorts of things like learning to ride a bike and their homework.

They are devastated he’s gone.

How can I help them?

They have written letters to him and we threw them into the river at his favourite spot for skimming stones but that isn’t enough

Happy Christmas dinners are not so easy this year as our family is disjointed and now dealing with loss

My younger two don’t want to go to the funeral but I’m torn.

I feel like I’m letting them down by forcing them to go but guilty towards my brother if I say they don’t have to go.

Please can you give me practical advice as to how I can help them? I’m 33 and at the moment I just want to be on my own.

I am literally living an hour at a time.

I don't even have time to grieve properly myself

Getty contributor

DEIDRE SAYS: I’m so sorry.

You are dealing with your own loss as well as with your children’s grief.

First, get support for yourself. It will help your children to see you can cope.

My e-leaflet Understanding Bereavement explains where to find help.

My instinct is to encourage them to go to the funeral but you know your own children.

You can talk it all through with Winston’s Wish who help bereaved children and those supporting them (winstonswish.org, 08088 020 021).

I hope their dad steps in to support them too.

Source: The Sun

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