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Shower sex with a pal was the best of my life — I want more but she says no as I’m engaged


Dear Deidre

I ASKED a girl mate for sex and we had a crazy afternoon in the shower. I want to do it again but she says no way.

It is complicated because I am already engaged to another girl.

Sex in the shower was better than I ever imagined

My fiancée is beautiful but she wants to wait until after we are married to have sex.

She says it is not all that important and will not even talk about the sexy things I want to do.

I am 24, she is 21 and we’re on opposite sides of the world as I was sent to work at my Australian office for six months.

The time difference means it is not easy to phone. We text a lot but she always falls asleep when I want to start sexting her.

I respect her choice to stay a virgin until we marry next year but I would love her to do something to keep me excited.

I recently moved into a new flat-share with another guy. He has a girlfriend who lives in the flat below us with her mate.

They are both 25. The girls spend a lot of time in our flat and I became very jealous when I saw my flatmate cosying up with his girlfriend.

The girls were with us last Saturday afternoon and we all had a few drinks.

Then my mate and his girl disappeared into his bedroom.

I was sitting next to the other girl and decided to try my luck.

I kissed her and she responded.

I'd never done anything so wild before

We talked about sexy things we could do and I was really turned on.

We had sex in my bed and then an even more amazing time in the shower afterwards.

It was the first time I had done something so wild and it was better than I had ever imagined it could be.

She knows I am engaged and she now says that it was just an afternoon of madness and will not happen again.

I really want it to but she totally refuses.

I love my fiancée but I am at breaking point with frustration now.

DEIDRE SAYS: You had both been drinking when this happened. The girl knows it was a mistake and has said it is not going to happen again.

She does not want to have sex with you and you must abide by that. She knows you are engaged so she is right to refuse.

Your fiancée does not want to have sex before marriage and you will have to respect that too but having sex with other girls is not the answer.

You will only end up feeling guilty and do nothing to improve your chances of a happy marriage.

It worries me that your fiancée says that sex is not important when it so clearly is to you.

You need to talk about this and whether she is willing to explore sexting and other ways you can get close while apart.

Otherwise marriage could be a disappointment for you both in different ways.

If she won’t even try, is this the right relationship for you?

Source: The Sun

My opinion: You're confused and addicted to sex, you'll never change even after you get married and I don't think your fiance likes sex, it's better you go your separate ways, as it would be a big problem in your marriage.